23/06/2026
IMPORTANT BUSINESS ANNOUNCEMENT
Following extensive risk assessments, management has decided to close the office on Thursday due to anticipated Scotland-related hangovers.
The cause of said hangovers is currently unknown and depends entirely on the result:
Qualify? Celebrate.
Don't qualify? Commiserate.
Either way? Pints.
Any urgent enquiries should be directed to Friday's version of us, who will hopefully be functioning again by then.
🏴 hashtag hashtag hashtag